Whispers from the Camino: Where to Serve

The next morning I woke in the pre-dawn hours in order to catch an Uber for a 7:00 a.m. train ride to Saint Jean Pied de Port on the southern border of France. This is where where the Camino Frances begins and I was looking forward to finally arriving at the official staging ground for the Camino.

First I had figure out how to get off the property of the Residence University Lanteri. I appreciated the overnight security, but it was just about as difficult to break out of the property as it would have been to break in. I finally found a open gate on the back side of the property and wound my way around the block to the front just a couple of minutes before my Uber arrived.

I had a delightful conversation with my driver—a divorced black woman from an African country that I can no longer recall. I asked about her making a new life in Paris and she asked about the reasons for my walking pilgrimage. In the end, she asked if would be coming back through Paris after the pilgrimage. I would have assumed that she was just drumming up business, but she also dropped the fact that she lived close to the monastery where I had been staying. It was interesting to get this subtle offer the day after I named the fact that I was ready to not be so alone on my adventures. Was I sending off a vibe of my new readiness for more connection? Or maybe reading more into a conversation than was there in some sort of a subconscious latent hope?

I told her I would be flying directly from Madrid to England after my pilgrimage and wouldn’t be coming through, thanked her for the ride, gave her a nice tip and continued my journey to the train station.

Again, just as in the airport and with the Paris trains to my monastery residence, I found all the signs completely confusing. I had a ticket with a definite destination and a time, but could find no signs that matched up with my ticket. I was learning, however. After about twenty minutes of trying to figure it out myself I finally cornered a young English-speaking lad from Britain. I caught him just as he was ordering coffee and pastries and in his eagerness to help he was nearly juggling his breakfast wanting to get me on my way before fully completing his purchase.

I was glad I reached out. After he explained the system, I realized that a foreigner would have a nearly impossible time figuring out the boarding system. My plan was to get there ahead so I could figure out exactly where I needed to be with time left over. But this is a large system with multiple trains on multiple tracks. The signage only changes after the prior train has left and a new train is ready to board. My young British friend took me to the right terminal and within a couple of minutes Saint Jean Pied de Port showed up on the signage broadcasting, “Boarding Now.”

Pictures from the train

To my surprise I boarded the plane and was sitting in a very large luxurious seat with extra leg room, a table, and broad arm rests. No one was sitting next to me. Further up I could see that there was a section with six seats to a row separated by an aisle. I tend to be a cheapskate (or very frugal!) and those should have been the seats for me. I checked my ticket again. Somehow when I had purchased it a few weeks before I had clicked the “business class” button. Oh well! I had already spent the money so I was going to damn well enjoy it!

Downtown Bayonne—train transfer

I had nearly eight hours on the train (including the transfer in Bayonne) which led to a rich time of reflection. One question surfaced almost immediately. It was “Where can I best serve?” I was at this threshold where I had to admit that I was no longer a good match for ecclesiastical executive work. I had served for nearly six years as an regional church executive both supporting and overseeing a system of nearly 100 churches.

I was also facing the complete vacuum of having no planned work set up at the end of October when I would come out the other side of walking the Camino and doing a little research in Britain on the pilgrimage infrastructure there.

That meant I had the next eight weeks to reflect, be open to, and trust that wherever I was meant to serve it would have to show up either in my mind or in an offer during this time. I wasn’t looking for work. I was simply trying to be open to where I was “supposed to be.” That is, where did Life need me most.

The truth is it was not a complete unknown. It was more like I had a number of options, but I had to listen for which of them had the most energy and traction both in my heart and in reality.

The only consistent theme in my various options is that all of them had very little financial security to them. That doesn’t mean that there weren’t those options; it just meant that the only options I was considering had to do with following the energy I was feeling about a growing pilgrimage culture. This is what I was trying to make myself available for.

I wrote a list of options I was considering and prioritized them based on how much energy I was feeling. This wouldn’t give me any answers, but it allowed me to go into the pilgrimage open to where more energy and synergy might show up. Would the list change? Would some items go up the list and others down the list? Would new options show up that I hadn’t considered before.

“Remember the Removal” Bike Ride on the Trail of Tears

Among those options on the list were working on designated pilgrimage routes on the Lewis and Clark Trail, the Trail of Tears and the Oregon Coast Trail. I also was keeping myself open to some short-term consulting work in churches during the winter months after I returned. And, finally I wondered whether my best way to serve would be to continue to write about my experiences through blogging and books, a practice I already had begun on previous pilgrimages.

Again, all good options, but financial security was not driving any of them.

As I eased my way out of reflecting on the “where should I serve” question, a second point of reflection showed up on the train. Once I arrived in Saint Jean Pied de Port I would have to make a decision about my intentions for the pilgrimage during registration. This would not be a simple task. I’ll explain next time.

Stay tuned…